360° Coverage : 4 Simple Ways To Have A Better Shot At Keeping Your New Year...

2 Updates

4 Simple Ways To Have A Better Shot At Keeping Your New Year's Resolutions

Jan 1 2014, 5:46pm CST | by

Two out of three of us make New Year’s resolutions. Only 8% keep them.  What’s the deal? A colleague sent me an article today, from the Atlantic, about why we don’t keep our resolutions, and what to...

Filed under: news

 
 
 

41 weeks ago

4 Simple Ways To Have A Better Shot At Keeping Your New Year's Resolutions

Jan 1 2014, 5:46pm CST | by

Two out of three of us make New Year’s resolutions. Only 8% keep them.  What’s the deal?

A colleague sent me an article today, from the Atlantic, about why we don’t keep our resolutions, and what to do about it. The main point of the article: most of what gets in our way is inside our heads.  The author notes that changing our mindset, rather than changing our behavior, is  key to change. For example, the top New Year’s resolution people make, year after year, is to lose weight.  Most of us know exactly what we need to do differently to lose weight (move more, eat less, focus on making healthier choices); the behaviors aren’t complex or mysterious.  What’s tough is to think differently.

Here’s an approach to doing just that.  Instead of focusing your resolutions on stopping your bad habits (eating too much, smoking, not spending enough time with family), think of them as learning to do something new (eating healthier; finding new ways to calm and de-stress; discovering shared activities that appeal to you and your family.)   Once you’ve reframed your resolution to focus on what you want to learn, apply these four key steps:

Make sure you really want to do it. If you’re attempting to make a change because you think you “should,” or because someone in your life has been pressuring you to do it, it’s extremely unlikely that you’ll be successful.  At the end of the day, we do the things we most want to do.  Ask yourself: “If no one else cared whether I made this change, would I do it?” If the answer is no, then I suggest you either give up your resolution (sorry about that), or find another way to think about it that does resonate for you. For example, you may find you’re not actually interested in losing weight – but you really want to be strong and healthy. Focus on learning how to do that.

Be accurate about yourself. If you want to learn something new, you have to be honest with yourself about where you’re starting from. For example, if you’ve been smoking a pack a day for 20 years, and you tell yourself quitting is going to “be a breeze” – that’s not helpful.  It will be more helpful to say to yourself something like, “I’ve been addicted to this stuff for a long time, and it’s going to take a real effort to find new ways to meet the needs that cigarettes fill for me.” It’s also important to be honest with yourself about things that might get in the way of your learning – things you may need to change.  For example, maybe your resolution is to become more active. Upon reflection, you realize that you think of exercise as boring and difficult. Acknowledging this truth will help you see that, in order to be successful, you’ll have to either change your self-talk about exercise or find ways of being active that are fun for you – or both.

Get interested in what’s possible.  Which brings us to the third key to learning.  Once you’re sure this is a change you want to make, and you’ve been as honest as possible about where you’re starting from, get curious about how you could make the change. Curiosity is key to any kind of human growth — from toddlers acquiring speech, to scientists making world-altering discoveries. For instance, getting curious about how to overcome your negative  beliefs about exercise might involve talking to someone who’s a late-onset exerciser, and finding out how he or she did it.  You might look for articles about how to change your self-talk, or you might investigate types of activity that you’ve never done but think might be fun.

In addition, you can respond to your own negative predictions (“I’ll never be able to do this”) with curiosity; “Why do I think that?” “How can I change the way I’m thinking about this?” “What can I do to get a different result?” Genuine curiosity has the power to break through most of the limitations we place on ourselves.

Be willing to be not-perfect. I suspect that the vast majority of people who make New Year’s resolutions start out doing the new behaviors they’ve targeted: for a few weeks they eat healthier, or don’t smoke, or drink less. Then – inevitably – one day they hit a speed bump: they eat a big gooey dessert, or cadge a cigarette from a friend, or have a few too many beers.  Most people at that point throw up their hands and say to themselves, ”I’m a failure. I just knew I wasn’t going to be able to keep this resolution.  I might as well go back to my old, bad ways.”  But there’s a powerful antidote to this – and it’s the final key to learning. Remember that, when we’re learning something new, we always make mistakes. There’s no such thing as being expert when you’re a novice. Think about when you were learning to drive, or ski, or cook: there were a lot of jerky stops/face plants/burned pans involved.  If you think of your new habit as something you’re learning to do, something at which you’re a novice, you’re much more likely to accept the fact that there will be stumbles along the way. And then, instead of taking a mistake as an indication that you’re doomed to failure, you can get curious about why it happened, and what you’ll do differently the next time…and keep learning.

If you shift your resolution focus from Here are all the bad things I’m going to stop doing to Here are a few new things I intend to learn how to do... this time next year, it’s much more likely that your life will have more of what you want, and less of what you don’t want.  So, here’s to your happy, healthy 2104, chock-full of discovery and growth….

________

Check out Erika Andersen’s latest book, Leading So People Will Followand discover how to be a followable leader. Booklist called it “a book to read more than once and to consult many times.”

Want to know what Erika and her colleagues at Proteus do? Find out here.

To acknowledge Erika’s contribution as a business thinker, vote for her here as a Top5 Speaker in management and business.  Thank you!

Source: Forbes Business

 
Update
2

7 weeks ago

Khazanah throws MAS RM6b lifeline

Aug 29 2014 5:01pm CDT | Source: Business Times Singapore

August 30, 2014 1:15 AMKHAZANAH Nasional will inject RM6 billion (SS$2.4 billion) over three years to resuscitate loss-making Malaysia Airlines (MAS) under a recovery plan that includes even an Act of Parliament. Other key moves are migrating its operations, assets and liabilities to a new c ...
Source: Business Times Singapore   Full article at: Business Times Singapore
 

 
Update
1

7 weeks ago

MAS posts loss of RM307m for Q2

Aug 28 2014 5:00pm CDT | Source: Business Times Singapore

August 29, 2014 1:13 AMMALAYSIA Airlines (MAS) registered a loss of RM307 million (S$122 million) for the second quarter to end-June, but warned of worse to come in the second half when the "full financial impact of th ...
Source: Business Times Singapore   Full article at: Business Times Singapore
 

 

Don't miss ...

 

<a href="/latest_stories/all/all/30" rel="author">Forbes</a>
Forbes is among the most trusted resources for the world's business and investment leaders, providing them the uncompromising commentary, concise analysis, relevant tools and real-time reporting they need to succeed at work, profit from investing and have fun with the rewards of winning.

 

blog comments powered by Disqus

Latest stories

Spanish nurse cured of Ebola
Madrid, Oct 21 (Xinhua) Spanish nursing auxiliary Teresa Romero was pronounced cured of the Ebola virus disease according to World Health Organisation (WHO) guidelines after the results of a second test confirmed Tuesday that she no longer had the virus in her blood.
 
 
Clinical trials of Ebola vaccine start Nov 1 in Switzerland
Geneva, Oct 21 (IANS/EFE) The World Health Organisation (WHO) announced Tuesday that it will begin clinical trials Nov 1 in Switzerland of one of the two anti-Ebola vaccines currently under development.
 
 
Colombia to launch world's first floating gas liquefaction plant
Bogota, Oct 21 (IANS/EFE) The world's first floating gas liquefaction plant is due to begin operating next year off the coast of northern Colombia under a pact between Canada-based Pacific Rubiales Energy and Belgian shipbuilder Exmar.
 
 
Paralysed man walks again after pioneering cell therapy
London, Oct 21 (IANS/EFE) A paralysed man has been able to walk again after therapy that involved transplanting cells from his nasal cavity into his spinal cord, the BBC reported Tuesday.
 
 
 

Latest from the Network

1,074 new dengue cases in Chinese province
Beijing, Oct 18 (IANS) China's Guangdong province has reported 1,047 new cases of dengue fever, health authorities said Saturday. Six people have already died in Guangdong -- five in Guangzhou and one in adjacent...
Read more on Business Balla
 
Blake Lively 'always' wanted to be mum
Blake Lively has ''always'' wanted to be a mother. The 27-year-old actress is expecting her first child with husband Ryan Reynolds and she admits she's been dreaming of this moment since she was a youngster. Speaking...
Read more on Celebrity Balla
 
Kris Jenner 'torn apart' by Bruce's new relationship
Kris Jenner feels ''torn apart and angry'' that Bruce Jenner is dating her former assistant. The 58-year-old matriarch split from the 64-year-old Olympic gold medalist last October following 22-years of marriage but is...
Read more on Celebrity Balla
 
Cheryl Fernandez-Versini won't move to France
Cheryl Fernandez-Versini doesn't want to move to her husband's home country of France. The 'X Factor' judge, 31, who comes from Newcastle, is adamant she won't be relocating any time soon to suit her new spouse Jean-...
Read more on Celebrity Balla
 
Lance Bass sets wedding date
Lance Bass has set a date for his wedding. The former *NSYNC singer and his partner Michael Turchin, who have been dating for two-and-a-half years, are to tie the knot on December 20, 2014, a representative for the...
Read more on Celebrity Balla
 
Nepal avalanche toll reaches 39
Kathmandu, Oct 18 (IANS) At least 39 climbers died while hiking on a key Nepali route after it was hit by a major snowstorm and avalanches earlier this week, BBC reported Saturday citing officials. Over 350 stranded...
Read more on Politics Balla
 
Jake Gyllenhaal says society is complicit in 'nightcrawling'
Jake Gyllenhaal says almost everybody in society ought to relate to his new movie 'Nightcrawlers'. The eagerly-awaited film concerns those people who monitor police scanners and then race to crime scenes to film eye-...
Read more on Movie Balla
 
India eves look for first win in AFC U-16 qualifiers
Dhaka, Oct 18 (IANS) India will hope to register their first win of the 2015 Asian Football Confederation (AFC) Under-16 Women's Championship qualifiers when they take on hosts Bangladesh in a crucial encounter at the...
Read more on Sport Balla
 
Moyes mulling return to management
London, Oct 18 (IANS) Former Manchester United manager David Moyes said that he is ready to revive his managerial career six months after being sacked by the 'Red Devils'. "I am ready to return. I have enjoyed the...
Read more on Sport Balla
 
Ebola fears loom over Ghana hosting AFCON
Accra (Ghana), Oct 18 (IANS) The Ghana Medical Association (GMA) cautioned the government Saturday against hosting the 2015 African Cup of Nations (AFCON), despite a request by the Confederation of African Football (...
Read more on Sport Balla